A few months ago, I noticed I could no longer purchase a Vault from the coolers by the cashier at Target. Weeks later, I discovered the same thing had occurred at my local Albertson’s. Today, I went to my local gas station, and could find only a one-liter bottle of Vault–no cans nor 20 oz bottles.
Vault is disappearing from the beverage world.
My suspicion was confirmed by the manager of the gas station. “Are you phasing out Vault?” I asked, incredulously. “Yeah. At my old store, they just pulled them from the shelves.”
“People don’t drink it?”
“No. It has a particular flavor about it that lots of people don’t like. We’ve had to throw away lots of bottles because they were expired.”
“Why didn’t you give them to me?!”
It seems that Vault is on the guillotine of consumer demand, and the blade is falling rapidly. How can this happen? Are all you Coke, Pepsi and Mountain Dew drinkers so inflexible* that you can’t grab a more tasty Vault every once in a while? Please, for pity’s sake, broaden your horizons!
Alas, I feel this meager post is too little, too late. Soon I’ll have to choose between a myriad of inferior, over-priced pops if I want a cool, carbonated caffeine rush. Finally, I know how Dan felt about Surge in the late nineties. Goodnight, sweet Vault. And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.
*You’ve got to get yourself into a flexible frame or you are no place!